Photo by Jamie Nix
Many things change. The development that takes place within one year is incomprehensible, until after it has happened and you are able to look how far (in both body and mind) you’ve travelled. This world of mine–it is … mine … in which I’ll be forever lost. And that is beautiful.
Feeling driven and suppressed, motivated and defeated in simultaneous waves. What exactly can I call this place I’m at in life?
With a running list of “to dos” I come home to defeat. “I’m done for the day,” I think to myself as my body grapples with fatigue, moving like sludge through my apartment. “Just a quick sit down and I’ll be ready ‘to do.’” But my mind rummages through its material and surfaces suppressed thoughts and I’m quickly engulfed by my obsessive need for answers to what I’m facing in this world of mine.
Am I too accommodating? Do I care too heavily for the convenience of others and repeatedly resort to placing myself on the back burner? Have I forgotten some passion? What on this earth am I searching for; wanting what I do not have, no longer and never had? Why do these thoughts even come to…
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